Local snake Waylan Slithers has defied a recently enacted COVID lockdown to try out a new restaurant in town. Despite now being quite possibly the worst time to dine in at an all you can eat buffet, Mr Slithers thought he’d give it a crack. “I’m jusssst exssssploring more dining optionssss,” he hissed. “I’m hereContinue reading “COVID lockdown doesn’t stop local snake trying out new restaurant”
Monthly Archives: Jul 2020
Local mum wondering if it’s too early for wine after finding winter wonderland in living room
Local mum Vanessa Carbury has stumbled upon a freak snowstorm in her very own living room just after 7 am today. Going against all weather forecasts for the region, the winter wonderland came as quite a shock, however there was no hint of disappointment in the inclement weather for her two young daughters. The youngstersContinue reading “Local mum wondering if it’s too early for wine after finding winter wonderland in living room”
New household greenery hopes to last longer than previous houseplant
The latest bit of greenery to join local pop yoga fanatic Kelsie Grenard’s apartment is sincerely hoping to outlast its previous appointee. The hardy sansevieria was last seen cowering in the corner, being subject to serenades, overwatering, and a serious lack of sunlight. “So I grew up in this beautiful nursery right. Then I getContinue reading “New household greenery hopes to last longer than previous houseplant”
DDOS attacks reported on ATO website
The ATO website has been subject to ongoing DDOS attacks since July 1, a senior government IT security spokesperson who wishes to remain nameless has revealed. “We’ve seen it take a real hit,” he said. “It’s been enormous, I’m talking in the order of from millions of different IP addresses at a time.” Meanwhile CraigContinue reading “DDOS attacks reported on ATO website”
Researchers find seagulls definitely worse than bin chickens
In a move that has shocked the general populace, researchers have found seagulls are definitely worse than ibises. Affectionately known as ‘bin chickens’, these smelly, public rubbish receptacle parasites have been narrowly edged out from their previous top spot on the list by those seaside dwelling beady-eyed bandits. With expert avian researchers accounting for numerousContinue reading “Researchers find seagulls definitely worse than bin chickens”
The Absent Beer 